Monday, July 6, 2009

Toohpaste and pheromone

Answer: Well, two possibilities - unexpected increase in attention from the opposite sex, or really, really, REALLY sweaty breath.

Why this discussion? Well, it all came about when I saw Transformers 2 with my buddy A.C. I'm there for the robots - he's there for pretty much the same reason why most of the guys in the cinema were there for: Megan Fox.

Its interesting: There were guys there, even ones with their girlfriends, unable to hold back their gasp when Megan Fox first appeared on the screen, slouched suggestively over a modded bike. I am not going to lie and say that she's not attractive, but I don't know why guys oggle over her. Honest.

I tell you what rocks my boat though - when my code works the first time I write it and test it. Or, when I manage to go through a downhill trail without stacking. Or when I get that praise from the management team after a successful consultation gig. That rocks my boat because its achievable, and REAL.

"Bro, if I saw Megan Fox on the street, god help me". Yeah, sure, god help him because 1) It's never going to happen and 2) My farts smell like Hugo Boss bottled - completely unfathomable and definitely not possible. Wait........... no, definitely not possible.

So, it was no surprise that when Megan Fox smiled, for that single moment every single guy forgot about their relationships and became single again. Correction: this isn't limited to just guys - some girls bit their lips as well. To be honest, its not fair. For someone to generate that kind of effect from just smiling is a travesty. Since when did smiling have that kind of effect? And why is it just limited to supermodels or attractive people? Why can't we have that kind of power as well?

Then I remembered Hanibal Lecter, and I immediately swallowed my words.

But in all honesty, that got my mind thinking - why is this reserved for the few? You see it everywhere - the person walking away with the best deal on the LCD TV is the chick that smiled to the salesperson. Or the one that gets extra topping on their pizza is that chick that flashed a grin to the shopowner. Or the one that gets the gig on a full on geek-a-zoid tech review show is the one that can flash those pearly whites.

Imagine a world where pheromones is fused in our toothpaste - two things can happen really. You'll start hearing people breathing quite heavily. And boy we'll have a new pollutant index for the EPA to report on. But at least we will all have a chance to achieve what these supermodels achieve with just a smile. I'll definitely smile a lot more (I'm not very photogenic - the wedding photographer probably used up all the RAM in his computer to photo edit my picture, unlike my wife. Oh, and she falls into that category of people who gets stuff from just smiling. We get really good food from the pasar malam when she smiles. I ain't complaining - as long as I get extra fried chicken in my nasi lemak, I'm smiling too).

If it does happen, I can truly say "Eat that Megan Fox!" ..... well, don't eat it. No one knows what happens when you consume concentrated sweat.